I have so much I need to be doing seeing that finals start tomorrow, but I need to get this off of my chest because if not it will kill me.
I have spent so much time hating myself, but right now, I hate the world.
1) I put my toes back in the dating pool and was scalded.
I am not a naive person, but silly me for thinking that a guy that asks you out for a drink would be single. Guess I should not assume things anymore because he has a FUCKING girlfriend.
Are you kidding me? There are adulterers out there that can find people to love them and I am single as all hell.
2) I was told by a certain person that “I do not handle my sadness in a healthy way.” This comment has been eating away at me for months. I have been racking my brain trying to figure out what I could do better, how I could change (thinking I needed to change). Guess what I recently realized? The mofo that implied I should change is actually the mofo that should do some self-reflecting.
From personal experience, I know people that deal with their sadness by-
getting black out drunk. beating people. breaking items. verbally abusing those around them. driving inebriated. physically hurting themselves. doing drugs. or all of the above.
You want to know what I do when I am sad?
Lay in my bed and listen to music, cry, talk about issues with my friends, self-reflect, see a counselor and write.
BUT I AM THE ONE WHO DOESN’T DEAL WITH HER SADNESS HEALTHILY.
I am hoping to God that I wake up from this absurd nightmare soon because this cannot be real.
These people cannot be serious.