Ghosts of Christmas Past

How is Christmas less than a week away?

Time flies so quickly, and holidays are a good marker to compare where I was in the past.

So, where was I at Christmas in 2013, and how have I changed?

First things first, I was a redhead.

246

Changing my hair is one of the few changes I embrace whole heartedly. Doing something different to my hair doesn’t scare me. Doing something different with my life? HA. I like consistency. Sometimes I get stuck in a rut with myself and crave physical change (in hopes that maybe I’ll see myself differently and like myself a little more). So because I can’t afford piercings and tats and other body mutilations, box dyes or scissors are usually the way to go.

Secondly, I was burned by lust. Twice. One after the other.

The thing about me is that I am always so forthcoming with who I am and how I feel. That is just easier for me. I am not afraid to show how I feel. I don’t like games. I try and have good intentions. I assume others do, too.

I am not into casual and meaningless things. No. When I enter a friendship or a romantic thing, I am in it for the long haul. Example? 2 of my best friends have been stuck with me since I was 6. I like longevity. Unfortunately, most people like things to be constantly changing. Temporary. Fun.  I tried entering into a relationship with two different guys who fooled me into thinking we were on the same wavelength. Needless to say, I was left with nothing but confusion.

But, here I am, a year later.

I am done with college.

Let me repeat that, I am done.

And for the first time, I have no plan.

*Cue changing hair out of sheer panic.*

And if you have read my blog, you know I have had some intense life experience,

so I don’t need to touch on that.

BUT.

I am here.

I am a year older. A year wiser. A year into my twenties.

I have learned so much.

I think I am less naive. Less hopelessly romantic. Life isn’t a 50s sitcom; it is real and hard and cruel. And I have grown up. I have evolved.

I just hope others learn from their experiences, too.

It is exciting how much unknown can happen in a year though. It is energizing.

Although I am sure I will inevitably hit some rough patches,

I cannot wait to see where I will be (and what my hair will look like) at next Christmas.

xmas selfie 2014

Happy Friday!

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